Black Friday 2005

How do you measure success on Black Friday? For some, it’s scoring the $348 laptop computer at Walmart or an Xbox 360 after standing outside in the cold for only eight hours. For others, it’s being secure in the knowledge that you’re snug in bed while the unwashed masses clamor over a 50 percent off sale on tube socks.

To my family, however, the day after Thanksgiving is a little bit different. It’s about scoring a bunch of the little free Christmas ornaments at JCPenney. (Actually, it only used to be Christmas ornaments – a somewhat puzzling quest considering my family is Jewish and would have no place to hang such an item. Now, however, the once mighty and now just barely breathing retail giant offers up mini Disney snow globes to its early-morning bargain hunters.)

Growing up, my parents would rouse us from our beds early on the day after Thanksgiving. We’d pile into the minivan and rush over to the nearest JCPenney store where we’d divide up and go in different entrances. "One gift per customer," the sales associates would say. Well a suggestion like that is only as effective as "Employees must wash hands before leaving the rest room." We all now how well that one works.

Systematically, we’d enter and exit the various doors of the store, sometimes switching shopping companions and sometimes switching clothing. All is fair in getting free crap. In our heyday, our family of five could leave with nearly 20 of the coveted pieces of the elusive freebie goodness.

In any case, it was always a thrill when we could pass for 16 or 18 or whatever arbitrary age they would set for distributing the free tzchockes. (Sadly, now that I am nearly 27, I still have trouble passing for such ages.)

My parents have since abandoned the 15-year tradition, apparently valuing sleep over free crap but my husband has, for some reason, decided to appease me and joins me for my early morning snow globe hunt. This year the two of us came away with a total of seven caroling Mickeys. We could have gotten more, thanks to an unattended display at the lower mall entrance, but it seemed almost too easy. Plus, I only have so many pockets.